Day Eleven.. Sabotage..

Whenever I think of weightloss, the first word that comes to mind is- failure. So far I've stuck to it one day, ate something I shouldn't have the following and then stuck to it the next.. then the cycle continues.. I don't feel any thinner, I feel tired.. annoyed with myself. I NEED to do this and really want to, yet can't. I'm not sure why I keep slipping up.. I just can't seem to resist anything! My head was in such a good place last week, now I just feel like 'oh well, I'm not a whale.. I've only got a few stone to lose so there's no rush'..

Actually there is. I need to be slim by July. I can't go on holiday feeling like the 'chubby friend'.. I'm not one of those people who can carry chub well.. Some girls slap on a bit of fake tan and look amazing despite a few wobbly bits, but me .. NO. I look horrible, any weight I put on really shows.. I'm wobbly, not toned and pale.. It's not a good look. I cannot possibly go on holiday in this state. Plus I wanted to be a stone lighter by the time I go on a short break with my boyfriend in April.. That isn't going to happen now.. It's just sabotage after sabotage.. :/ I need to be looked away for a year with only shakes and no food.. Seriously. Wherever's there is food I seem to eat.. I'm rarely even hungry but food is such a big part of my life that I feel so hard done by without it. How sad is that. I admitt it though, I'm under no pretense that food completely dominates my life. I need to break the cycle..

I need to lose this weight..

The only thing I can do is be honest with my consultant and keep taking her advice.
I will get there, by July.. no matter what it takes.

x

Day Seven.. One week complete :)

One week done.. :)
3 1/2 lbs down.. I'm happy with that considering I drank this weekend and ate pizza but next week I want the same! I need to lose 4lbs and I get the bag I want from accessorize! :D

All ready for the next week.
I'm going to do this :D

05/03/11- Oops.

Last night I was naughty.. ordered pizza :S Had two slices.. felt full and have now woken up feeling sick and horrible.. Eurgh :/ Annoyed with myself.. I just couldn't ignore my cravings for carbs though :(
Anyways.. onwards, and upwards! Today is a new day :)

04/03/11- Day Two COMPLETE.

So far so good. Really realised today how key keeping busy is! Was in school until gone 7pm and wasn't really thnking of food at all!! So I just need to keep moving and keep my mind elsewhere.. Pizza leaflets also stop coming through my door :P

Tired and achey today..as it my flatmate.. in bed all cosey :) I'm feeling really positive about this.. I can do it this time! I can be a size 10.. I can be slim, happy and I can look good :D

Looking forward to the weighin.. 5 more days! I can also have bars then too, yayyy :)

x

03/03/11- Day One..

Day one- tick :D
3x chocolate shakes.. they are yum! I drink them in about 2 seconds though.. need to learn the art of savouring.. :P
Not so good on the water front.. Still need to drink my 2 litres :/
Also decided I'm going to do half hour light exercise later on.. if I get my school work done first..
Feels good to have support from flatmate.. CC and boyfriend :)
I know I can do this.. just got to focus :)

02/03/11- "Life doesn't have to be this way.."

Feeling so motivated.. honestly, more than ever..
Met with my consellor, she is such an inspirational person.. has so much time for everyone.. I've got my shakes, I CAN do this..

Me and Bex are going shopping Saturday for a lovely new dress.. this will be my incentive.. I'm going to get a size 10 and I wnt to be in it by the end of July! I
I'm looking forward to hanging it up.. It'll motivate me :)

My CC also showed me pictures of a girl around my size now and how within a few months she was size 8/10 and looked so good! It really helped me see I can transform myself.. It actually is possible. Before I've just looked at myself at thought 'urgh, you'll look disgusting anyway.. you may as well just stay food and eat lots of yummy food'.. But really, life does not have to be this way :D

Here it goes.. I'm aiming for a 5lb loss in my first week :D
Fingers crossed..

x

28/02/11- Bye bye yummy food...

I've just watched the Biggest Loser and wow those people loook amazing! :) However I did watch it while eating galaxy though.. :/ Slightly bad, although it is my last bar of chocolate before Cambridge.. so I'm entitled to say goodbye....

Curry for tea with rice.. mmm stodge! I'm definitely going to miss carbs, but they are the bain of my life.. really.

I'm feeling ready to do this!
Booked my incentive today... 10 days in Malaga this summer :D I need to look amazing! I can't be a fatty abroad.. it's just not right.. Although I'm going to Camber in Easter and want to have lost a stone by then.. only a month or so away.. best get focused then :)

My first treat.. a sexy new handbag! :) I'm going to choose it this weekend, a lovely new Accessorize one I think :D Just 7lbs and I'll get it. Even better if I could get it free.. perhaps I should look into sponsered weight losss.. Hmm.

Tomorrow I'm going to eat pizzzaaaaa.. Sainsbury's do an amazing takeaway style one.. worth the calories? Hmm maybe.. It'll be my last supper.. I deserve it..

Saying goodbye to yummy food and saying hello to protein and shakes but more importantly a new me :D

26/02/11- A new me begins Wednesday..

Ok so luckily I have an appointment Weds.. me and my flatmate are doing it together!
From Wednesday I'll be following the Cambridge plan..
I'll update this blog then..

My first goal- to survive a week of the CD! :)
Wish me luck :)

x

26/02/11- Things aren't exactly going to plan..

Okay so after my entry yesterday I contacted a previous Cambridge consellor, but she's busy until next Monday but recommended somebody else.. I contacted her, no reply.. probably because I was meant to see her before but couldn't make it last minute, but still not the point.. so I could either wait a whole week and see my previous consellor then and risk putting on MORE weight or just wait until this one (hopefully) replies.. Ideally I wanted to start Monday.. a fresh week, a fresh 1/2 term at school etc.. So now I stuck with what to do? Wait.. or just seek another option..

I spent last night looking into other LCDs, including Lipotrim.. and also Tony Ferguson.. most importantly I looked at the weight loss averages per week and it seemed around the same.. but Cambridge still being the one where most weight could be lost.. I'm not sure what to do.. Argh, it just seems as though there are so many diets out there, all promising the same things! :/ So I think the next step is to look at cost, I don't want to spend more than £40 a week really.. £30 would be amazing! (unlikely..) Basically, I want a LCD.. one where I'm going to see quick results.. I'm beyond the point now where losing 1lb a week is suffice... I need the quick results to spur me on.. and keep me on track.. I've tried calorie counting/ healthy eating and exercise and I just feel disappointed in the slow weight loss and feel I need to take food out of the picture altogether..

Tonight is going to spent doing some serious research.. Basically what is the cheapest.. most promising diet out there?!

P.S- Weighed myself today.. no change from a week ago.. and I've been consuming 1200 calories per day.. and drinking more water.. What is going on??!

x

25/02/11- Enough is ENOUGH.

Horrified when weighing myself today.. 12.7! :O Not the biggest I've ever been, but pretty huge.. especially for my tiny 5'3" height! So I have resolved today that I will join Cambridge and lose 3 stone..

I've been calorie counting for the last 2 weeks, aiming to lose half a stone.. instead I've put on 2lbs.. :/ When I look back I am surprised.. I've eaten out with my parents once but other than that I've been eating less and watching what I eat.. Although the scales don't lie so something must have gone into my mouth! :S

Anyways, my first step is to record me BMI today... Obese category-. It feels horrendous to admit just how overweight I've become.. and how much I've just let my weight creep up and up.. soon I'll be 13st.. If I don't stop this. NOW.

My second step is to set an overall goal, as well as mini goals to keep me motivated along the weigh. I want to weigh 9 1/2 stone, with a clothes size of 10. My first mini goal is survive a week on Cambridge.. with a weight loss of 4lbs in the first week.

I'm also going to post a dreaded 'before' picture, and then post a picture every week. I'm going to keep note of my measurements too, again to keep me motivated and focused on the outcome..

I WILL do this!

Join me on my discovery of a slimmer me :)